M. Francis Enright is co-creator with John Brancaccio of The Working Experience. He is also a filmmaker and published author. Listen to full episodes on iTunes and Spotify and visit our website: theworkingexperience.com for videos, merchandise and more. You can also find us on Facebook, Linked In, Instagram, and Twitter.
A response to this email requires a certain pithiness.
Dear Mr. Enright,
Thank you for sending us “A Rest Beside the Road”. We appreciate the chance to read it. Unfortunately, the piece is not the right fit for _________________. We ask that you would wait at least five (5) months before submitting work to us again.
Please remember to log and update your submission on Duotrope. We wish you the best of luck in placing this piece elsewhere.
For updates and news about our journal, please “like” and follow us on our social media pages.
Dear The Editors,
So great to get your email. I guess by “not the right fit” you mean it won’t fit up your ass because your stupid, fat f*ckn’ head is already crammed up there. And thank you for clarifying the five month wait by writing the word “five” and the number “5” because I am a f*cking moron who can’t tell the difference. And thank you also for the condescending offer to submit another story to your worthless rag, as long as I wait five (5) months so you can reject it and send me another form email you assh*oles. What are you, f*cking stupid? Maybe I’ll print the story out, wrap it around a brick, and throw it through your window, you illiterate sack of sh*t.
Don’t get it twisted.
P.S. Follow and like you on social media? Sure, let me take care of your laundry while I’m at it. And sh*t in the washing machine.